Hey guys, I was going to post my normal weekly goals this morning, but then I thought “wow, we haven’t sat down and had a talk about life in a while.” So that’s what I want to do today.
Life is kind of crazy, messy, and just all over the place as of late.
So last week, I got into a car accident, which was shocking in and of itself. Everyone was fine (except for my car), but that’s just a material thing. Because of that, I’ve been thinking about getting a new car. I’m driving my mom’s car right now, but I’ve been getting a lot more busy with work and my odd jobs (aside from my normal job, I have odd jobs like working at the gun store, I’m a buyer and I also do a lot of promotional work, and freelancing! Plus, I help my parents out with the kids — boy scouts, volleyball, oh my!). And I’m thinking about joining the local paddling club… So I kind of need a new car… Ya know?
On Tuesday, I have an appointment with a cosmetic dentist, which I’m actually super excited about. Not to toot my own horn, but I was born with perfect teeth (at least, I think so). They’re super straight and I’ve never had braces or anything like that. #blessed? The only thing I’ve ever done for my teeth is getting them professionally whitened, which is an amazing investment! But, I did have to get fillings in between my front teeth, which is the weirdest thing ever, but those are the cards I was dealt. Anyway, I got them filled a few years ago and over the years (and my unstoppable coffee addiction), the fillings got stained and left me with a really unflattering dark stain in between my teeth. Gross. So I’m going to get them professionally fixed. I’m not sure how it’s done, but I’m excited.
Wednesday is the big day. I’ve been getting scans, tests, MRIs, etc, and all those tests are leading up to Wednesday, which is when my doctor will know whether or not I’m finally going to be in remission. I don’t know what Wednesday has in store for me. I’ve been feeling on top of the world lately, no fevers, no pain, no nausea. I haven’t been having any symptoms at all. It’s like I’m not even sick. However, because of the illness that I have, there’s really no telling of which way this can go. I might not be feeling sick because I’m in remission, or my disease has just spread into other areas of my body and I’m just not feeling the symptoms yet. That’s why we’ve done tons and tons of tests so my doctors can be certain of what’s going on, and we prevent misdiagnoses, which has happened a few times before. Whichever way it goes, whatever news he gives me on Wednesday, I’m not necessarily ready to hear it, but as always, I’m willing and ready to fight. :)
It’s been about one week since I received my MateFit in the mail and started eating healthier and whatnot. I love it so far! If you haven’t read my post about it, it’s here. Anyway, I’ve been eating super clean (Oatmeal, yogurt, fruit, salads, protein shakes. No bread, sugar, coffee), and I’ve honestly never been so energized and happy in my life. I don’t get hunger pangs or cravings and wait for it……. I don’t even miss coffee. What? Yeah, I know. (Okay, maybe I miss it a little bit, but I’ve realized that I’m not dependent on it! I can function without it. Who would thought!)
This past weekend and the weekend prior, I’ve been helping my parents with some spring cleaning, which if you know anything about me, is my most favorite thing in the whole wide world. No sarcasm. I love cleaning. Anyway, I came across boxes of old photos of camping trips with my birth father, and it’s something that is really personal and something I don’t really talk about, but it got me thinking this past weekend. The last time I talked about my relationship with my birth father on this blog was over a year ago when him and I rekindled our relationship. Since then, we’ve lost touch because of various reasons and because of that, we haven’t spoken in a year. It’s a very touchy subject, but since I see you all as my major support group, opening up about it is very important to me. I never thought I would have an estranged parent, but I do. I just haven’t spent any time trying to deal with it, or cope with it. Is there coping involved when a parent goes astray? I don’t even know how to answer that. All I know is that it’s been a year of not speaking to my father, and honestly it hurts. I’m just not sure what hurts more: the fact that my father and I don’t have a relationship, or the fact that I still care while he doesn’t care at all.
To end on a brighter note, I’ve been absolutely loving my job! It’s really great and I’ve made a lot of new friends and learned a lot so far, it’s just really cool. And a lot of you have been asking me about my new job, and want to know what I do, where I work, etc., so if you’re interested in a post all about my work, then let me know!
Sorry I got a little heavy on you this morning, but sometimes you gotta get in your feelings, ya know?
Have a bangin’ Monday! (I love you guys, thank you to the moon and back for being the best support group, friends, lovers out there) <3 :)